


The Burden of a Monster

by kai_lypso



Series: The Burden of a Monster [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-01
Updated: 2014-07-01
Packaged: 2018-02-06 22:48:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1875381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kai_lypso/pseuds/kai_lypso
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by: shingeki-headcanons.tumblr.com/post/81149018254/7-after-eren-annihilated-all-the-titans-he was<br/>taken from Google search since the original post has been deleted: "but before he could accept, he locks himself in an empty room with nothing but a mirror and whispers,... 'every last one of them,' and kills himself."</p><p>The titan's had finally been defeated and what was left of humanity triumphed. Everyone was happy, except for one person.</p><p>Eren Jaeger.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Burden of a Monster

**Author's Note:**

> I cried while writing this. I'm sorry not sorry. It was a wonderful prompt and I've been trying to write it since I saw it. I want to write more based on this, but we'll see.

The titans had finally been defeated and what was left of humanity triumphed. Parties and trips were being planned, some for a lifetime outside the walls. Everyone was happy, except for one person.

 

Eren Jaeger.

 

Eren stood in front of his mirror looking at the outfit he was to wear to the award ceremony, hanging on the wall next to the mirror.

 

It was a suit. A very nice suit at that. Of a simple, but elegant, black. Mikasa had insisted he wear a green tie. 'To bring out his eyes.' There really was no point in soiling a nice suit by wearing it now.

 

The ceremony was to award the people who made a significant difference in the war against the titans.

 

People such as Commander Erwin Smith or Captain Levi.

 

Not Eren Jaeger the monster.

 

Eren had considered his course of action even before the last titan fell. Through his determination and one track mind, one question continued to worm it's way to the surface.

 

_What will I do when it's all over?_

 

The truth was, not all of the titans were eliminated and letting that last titan live contradicted the very thing that fueled Eren's life since his mother died.

 

He knew he was being selfish. What about Mikasa? Or Armin? How about the other friends he made throughout the years? Would any of them understand his motive for this decision? He knew Jean wouldn't.

 

With a hollow laugh Eren turned away from the suit to locate his recently unused 3DM gear.

 

As he did, thoughts raced through his mind. Thoughts of the Commander, the Captain, the crazy squad leader Hanji, his friends and even his not so friends. He mainly thought about what Armin and Mikasa would do now that humanity could go beyond the walls.

 

He took position in front of the mirror again. this time taking a moment to look at his reflection. His eyes were dark and tired and looked sunken into his skull. Arm's hung bony at his sides, the muscle thin and lanky.

 

Armin would most likely go exploring, Mikasa too, in search of the mystical thing called the ocean. That would make them happy.

 

Another small chuckle passed Eren's chapped lips and when his eyes locked with those in his reflection, he could see the ghost of a smile gracing his sunken features.

 

Eren took a deep breath and raised his arms to grab his sword with both hands, leveling it with his heart.

 

"Every last one of them..."

 

The whisper was lost to a gasp taking it's place as Eren forcibly pulled his arms towards his body. The bite of the sword alighting fire in his veins.

 

His mouth gaped open and he gasped, a bubbly, raspy sound, and looked back into his reflection. For a brief moment, his eyes turned wild and he felt a stirring in his gut, then darkness clouded his vision.

 

Blood trickled out of his mouth as it continued to work in a vain attempt to suck in air that wouldn't come. Tears streamed down his face and the feeling was suffocating.

 

Memories of his life flashed before his eyes in no apparent order and Eren was surprised to see trivial moments blending in with the others of this morbid reel.

 

Quiet, serene moments appeared next to devastating and intense moments and Eren realized those were just as important as any other memory, to who he was.

 

He could feel his body attempt to heal the fatal wound, but the sword was still lodged in his heart, preventing proper healing.

 

Eren coughed up more blood and sank to his knees, blood flowing over his hands. When his vision started to fade out he was surprised to still see flashes of his life as if they were trying to pull him back to life. Then he finally felt nothing.

 

\----

 

The high pitched scream that echoed throughout the halls chilled the blood of anyone who heard it.


End file.
